For Nel :)

Well I got a kick in the butt this morning from half way around the world no less.
My dear friend Janelle has informed me that I haven't blogged for a bit, and it's not that I haven't meant to but i've been a bit busy at work and then by the time I get home i'm so tired plus i have come down with a cough that is draining me :(
But enough excuses.
My weight stayed the same last week but considering I didn't really exercise that's to be expected.
My food intake has been good as has my water so really I just have to get the energy up to get moving (I always feel better afterwards)

I will also shamelessly use this blog to send subtle messages to nel to come back & move to brisbane so that we can hang out all the time, although i'm sure that allie will be just as eager to have nel in Melbourne, oh to feel loved :)

Why you don't take the easy way out....

Soooooo time for an update.
Yesterday I was T-I-R-E-D & didn't update. Naughty me. I couldn't even be bothered making dinner even though I bought the ingredients to do it. It all came down to me not wanting to dice the chicken so that I could have an awesome Honey Teriaki stirfry with udon noodles & heaps of veggies... I know right, it sounds awesome so why not put in the effort???
Well instead, I got home & was too exhausted to want to do even that so I convinced Justin to get red rooster. I walked past there on the way home & their chicken smelt really really good, so I decided I wanted a red rooster roll. I even got it without the chips to be good (although I did have some of J's)
So Justin got a roll as well, only difference is he got bacon & cheese on his. About 15 minutes after eating it he was on the toilet & has remained there throughout today.... & me, I feel awesome!!
Although I have to confess, I feel super bad, because if I actually cooked dinner, he wouldn't be feeling so horrible....
Time to take him to the doctors I think, & actually cook a nice healthy dinner tonight :)

Going Down!!

Well as the title suggests, i'm going down. Not in the way that most males wish for but in a way that has me feeling lighter on the inside... and by that I mean less bloated.
I weighed in this morning & was 93.2 so within a week have had a loss of 3.2 kilos.
There are some things I could have done better like more exercise or less cake yesterday but overall i'm pretty happy with my result.
As I said earlier, i'm feeling less bloated, could be that I start my day now with a glass of metamucil then some green peppermint tea. It makes a good kickstart to the day!
Well off to adjust my ticker at the top of the page then get ready for work.

Have a great day!!!

Sunny Sunday :)

I spent today at Justin's parents house in Toowoomba. We had lunch there & stayed longer than we thought we would. Sometimes time gets away from you when you are having a nice time.
The highlight of my day was the ride on lawnmower/baby tractor that I got to play on. The lawn is not doing as well & a bit patchy in some areas but fun none the less.

So today I saw my brothers wedding photos (he got married last week in bali) & I am determined to make sure that when I make the trip down the aisle, that I get as much of this weight off as possible so that I can look back & feel as good about the pictures as I remember feeling when i finally get to say "I do".

With that said, it's time to go get some exercise in so that I know i've done everything possible to get a good weigh in figure tomorrow.

Hope you all had an awesome day. Don't forget to live life now instead of waiting to loose the weight to live life :)

Drizzly rainy day

Well not exactly drizzly. There was alot of rain this morning, and thunder then grey overcast skies. Now we are getting thunder again.
These kinds of days are perfect for staying in bed aren't they?
Well I have to say, the motivation is still reasonably high because i'm still in my first week but I know that in a few weeks time a day like this will have me eating the fun size crunchies in the fridge.
Old me would have said, "just eat them all then they are all gone" - realistic me is saying "it's ok to have one occasionally, not every day, but occasionally".
So today I have had a bit of a change in the breakfast foods, I ate multigrain toast with spinach leaves, tomato, bacon & egg - it is after all the weekend.
For lunch I had a multigrain sammich with avacado, spinach leaves, tomato & a slice of cheese.
Dinner will be chicken & veg.
I've snacked on carrot sticks & almonds today & have already made the decission that I will not indulge in a crunchy today. If I want something sweet I will have some yoghurt or a pear.
and now i'm off for a walk to get some activity in before rain decides to hit :)

~~~~~~~~~ My Goals ~~~~~~~~

So yesterday I said that i'd post my goals up. When I sat down to make up these goals, it was because I was frustrated, tired & couldn't sleep because if i was on my back my boobs and skin came up too far & felt like they were suffocating me, if I was on my sides I would cut off circulation to my arms & get sore & I got uncomfortable on my tummy because i'm not used to sleeping that way. So I decided to write my goals & my awards.
I decided to make S.M.A.R.T. goals. "specific, measurable, attainable, realistic and timely".
I think part of my issue is that if I look to loose 10 kilos before rewarding myself it's too far away & feels unatainable, so I set goals & rewards every 2.5 kg starting at 92.5kg. I know that my first week I will be in for a larger loss & as I go along the losses will get smaller & harder to achieve but with that said, 2.5kg to the next goal is still easier to visualise attaining than 10kg.
As I go along, the rewards get better (and more expensive) but they are things that I want for me and that will make me feel better about me. So without further ado, here are my goals :)


Starting Weight 96.4kg - End Goal Weight 75kg

Goal 1 - 92.5kg: New Hair Dye/Colour
Goal 2 - 90.0kg: New Pair of Jeans
Goal 3 - 87.5kg: Underarm & Leg Wax
Goal 4 - 85.0kg: Justin gets eyebrow pierced
Goal 5 - 82.5kg: Manicure/Pedicure
Goal 6 - 80.0kg: New "Cute" lingerie set
Goal 7 - 77.5kg: Facial & Hair Cut/Colour
Goal 8 - 75.0kg: Australian citizenship


I'm sure i'll want to loose a bit more to get into a healthier weight range but 20kg is enough to focus on for now.
So far i'm tracking well for a loss on Monday& i'll keep you posted through the weekend.
Will have to do damage control tomorrow. Tonight was take out Friday & I went with hot chips. also 2x fun size crunchies. Otherwise eating for the rest of the day was well controlled :)

Is it just me or are fun size better than normal or king size? I once read that taste buds only really pay attention & savour food for the first few bites, in which case, if we eat for the taste, maybe it's better to eat bite size?

Starting Over

Well guess who's starting over? That's right it's me :)

I'll give you the quick run down on my stats Monday Morning I was 96.4kg... damn!!
My heaviest recorded weight ever was 97.3 a few years back. Aprox this time last year I was 82kg, so as you can see i've made backwards progress.

I'm once again at the stage where my circulation cutsoff when I sleep & i'm constantly waking with pins & needles. I'm unfit & generally just unhappy with myself. I've been this way for a bit now but every week that I swear i'm going to make a change I don't do it & I add a few hundred more grams.

I decided that the buck stops here & if I want results i'll have to work at it so I am.
I'm not ww'ing but I am resorting back to the principles that saw me successful last time.
I will weigh in every monday morning & post on here. If I start to plateau then I will give myself 2 weeks to pull out of my funk, if I start to go backwards then I will cough up the money & rejoin.
I have to say that the ww boards are proving helpful & supportive for me & I still see a fair few of the same friendly faces on there which is also helpful & keeping me accountable.
I've also made myself a set of goals & rewards which i've broken down to 2.5kg increments starting at 92.5kg to help me stay focussed. Tomorrow i'll post the goals :)
Justin is remaining supportive as always but it is a very guarded support at this stage as I have started then stopped so many times. I did tell him not to support me but of course he wants to support me all the time so he is trying to stick by me without hurting himself by getting his hopes up that this time I will make it.
Best of all though, I really do feel that I am doing it for me this time, which makes me confident I will get results. I think it's no longer about not liking myself, it's about liking myself enough to admit I want better.